Omaha, NE (CBS) Police Chief John Schrunchy announced at a press conference this morning that charges will be filed against Jay Slagle, the local author who subjected people around the world to the horrific ’20 Days of Stupid,’ a social medial and abstract art project. The ‘20 Days’ project was scheduled to end today, but some observers have suggested that Slagle’s actions the last 20 days are no different than anything he did before the project started on November 23.
“I’ve known him for ten years,” said neighbor Tim Gunn, “and the only time the guy is serious is when he’s constipated. Oh, and the time all of his kids ran away because they were sick of him. I don’t think he said anything stupid that entire day.”
Chief Schrunchy gave vague responses to what charges might be filed, but possibilities appear to include the following:
- Indecent use of the English language;
- Unauthorized use of the Internet for nefarious deeds;
- Illegal use of the Dodge Street pedestrian bridge for commercial purposes;
- Picketing without a permit;
- Cruel and unusual embarrassment of his children;
- Theft by deception (he’s really saying this book is worth $10?);
- Indecent exposure for distributing a photograph of his bald head via the Internet.
Slagle will be arrested as soon as he can be found. He may be fleeing the state. If so, the State Patrol has been directed to not let him return to Nebraska. His wife issued a statement, giving her blessing for the State Patrol to do “whatever it needs to do” to keep Slagle from returning home.
Jack and Noah’s Big Day by Jay Slagle is available for $9.99 at the Bookworm bookstore at 8702 Pacific in Omaha or on-line at Amazon. Learn more about the book at www.jayslagle.com. This is the final day of his ‘20 Days of Stupid’ project, which ran from November 23rd thru December 12th on Twitter (JaySlagleWrites), Instagram (JaySlagleWrites), Facebook (JackAndNoahsBigDay) and his website (www.jayslagle.com). The book is available for reservations at the Omaha Public Library.